" i miss you. "these mere words, might mean nothing to you... may be meaningless. but it has destroyed every of my will and strength to forget, to move on. how can i not see it coming? and fuck, i kept losing it. over again and again. this time its a little different.
im totally devastated. however,
im unsure to which direction i should vent it to. its not clear. its not easy. at lost, once more. with myself back in square one.
choices.
in between love and hate, try and give up. new or old, move on or turn back.
im uncertain of what im fearing. to put my heart at stake again when its barely beating. its already like so stale, sooo dead. this seclusion is stealing my every breath, overshadowing every mess with whats barely existing. i realised i had nowhere to end because i didnt have a beginning. i dont understand what im facing and what made me deserve this. the ups and downs. running for something i know i have to get, and then get another word of hopelessness for the mistake of stopping awhile to catch my breath. the simmering hopes and dangling dreams, the empty feeling and full-hearted views, the lone and the sunshine, the wind and the storms. now im in a cold, dark mess of tangles up wires, which leads to different places, different things. one by one a wire is fixed, and tangled and i didnt care when it birthed out. now every wire of this crooked life is in this heartbreaking mess. my brain strains to contain so much things. and then im stuck somewhere in between some unknown circuits of some unknown world. these anguish in silence is slowly consuming my every bit thats left. nonentity's all that theres left of me. for the name of good, for what is best. choices were never an alternative i guess…
im addicted to this song on my playlist, thanks to wawan~
